you beat the amnesiac! But some examples I have going with the style i had in mind which may or may not suck:
type "game_enter"
{
"To embrace the simulated slaughter of virtual individuals is what I have arrived in this binary space partition for";
type "level_end_lose"
{
"That concludes our test of the emergency whinecasting system.";
"";
"aw, goshdarnitalltoheckfireandgoshdarnyoutooandgoshdarkissuperhottoobadshesnotinthisgameanymoreshessmokinliketheheckfiresofheckwhichmakessensesincesheisasuccubusfromheckandshehasreallybigtalent";
"";
"";
"I have witnessed the total destruction of my score and this has driven me to water my daisy garden.";
type "hit_nodeath"
{
"not good enough darnit! not good enough!";
"";
"";
"";
"";
"I hit you and you did not die so i will hit you some more until you die";
By the way I can't open .xls files.